Monday, July 19, 2010

Crazy Baby Voiced Whores

She would be wearing a pearl necklace.

So...I hate women with baby voices. This seems to be a modern trend for women to make their voices sound like a little girl's, I think it started with Marilyn Monroe's annoying breathy voice, which I would take any day over this current nonsense. It seems like they think that the baby voice gives them a "get out of jail free" card...literally. Look at stupid ass Paris Hilton. I hate her. She's been caught with weed TWICE in a month and doesn't get punished. (Yes I know she went to jail once, for half a second, she sure didn't learn her lesson did she?) Men love her because of that baby voice and because she's borderline mentally retarded so she'll let them do anything to her. Her perfume smells like what a candy fart would smell like, grossly sweet.

The ONLY person I know that wears this candy fart perfume ALSO has a baby voice and ALSO thinks she can get away with anything she wants because of it and ALSO is a crazy whore. I understand why the baby voice works on men, they think that girls with that voice are easy, which is true, but why does it work on women? Shouldn't we see through this BS? "Oh, she sounds like a 5 year old, she must be innocent." NO! If she's 24 and sounds like a 5 year old she must be mentally unhinged! I don't like being discriminated against for not having the voice of a stupid spoiled whore. I have the voice of a normal, logical person, thank God for that!
So, tip of the week: If you see a women that has this problem don't think "what a sweetheart," think "that chick is a skank and has mental problem, I need to get as far away from her as possible."

5 comments:

Glennis said...

I really doubt that men love Paris Hilton. Or at least, men who are worth knowing.

And WTF is it with perfumes endorsed by celebrities? Yes, I'm talking about you, too, Britney Spears. Why would anyone want to buy perfume endorsed by someone who is a skank? I just read that Snooki might be coming out with one. Can you imagine?

Michael said...

You fail too address the elephant in the room, that which is the most common REASON why this affectation" occurs. Be brave. Dig deep. You KNOW the answer....

Sylvia Plathypus said...

LMAO I think we were separated at birth...

I laughed so hard reading the candy fart line that I almost peed myself!! Seems interesting that she even has it together enough to come out with a line of anything but skeezy porn or designer cocaine. I too want to murder and remurder those twatty bitches with the baby voices. I hear them in public and remark to my husband that if they worked as hard at being smart as they did at making their voice sound like a total moron, they might actually make it in the world. And usually loud enough for them to hear me. LOL

Sylvia Plathypus said...

On an unrelated note, I ♥LOVE♥ the caption under Mr. Bojangles' pic!! What a cool kitty. =)

L said...

Passion of the mom, you are hilarious! Mr. Bojangles is pretty much the coolest and most judgemental cat ever. He even bitch slapped one of my gays.

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Monday, July 19, 2010

Crazy Baby Voiced Whores

She would be wearing a pearl necklace.

So...I hate women with baby voices. This seems to be a modern trend for women to make their voices sound like a little girl's, I think it started with Marilyn Monroe's annoying breathy voice, which I would take any day over this current nonsense. It seems like they think that the baby voice gives them a "get out of jail free" card...literally. Look at stupid ass Paris Hilton. I hate her. She's been caught with weed TWICE in a month and doesn't get punished. (Yes I know she went to jail once, for half a second, she sure didn't learn her lesson did she?) Men love her because of that baby voice and because she's borderline mentally retarded so she'll let them do anything to her. Her perfume smells like what a candy fart would smell like, grossly sweet.

The ONLY person I know that wears this candy fart perfume ALSO has a baby voice and ALSO thinks she can get away with anything she wants because of it and ALSO is a crazy whore. I understand why the baby voice works on men, they think that girls with that voice are easy, which is true, but why does it work on women? Shouldn't we see through this BS? "Oh, she sounds like a 5 year old, she must be innocent." NO! If she's 24 and sounds like a 5 year old she must be mentally unhinged! I don't like being discriminated against for not having the voice of a stupid spoiled whore. I have the voice of a normal, logical person, thank God for that!
So, tip of the week: If you see a women that has this problem don't think "what a sweetheart," think "that chick is a skank and has mental problem, I need to get as far away from her as possible."

5 comments:

Glennis said...

I really doubt that men love Paris Hilton. Or at least, men who are worth knowing.

And WTF is it with perfumes endorsed by celebrities? Yes, I'm talking about you, too, Britney Spears. Why would anyone want to buy perfume endorsed by someone who is a skank? I just read that Snooki might be coming out with one. Can you imagine?

Michael said...

You fail too address the elephant in the room, that which is the most common REASON why this affectation" occurs. Be brave. Dig deep. You KNOW the answer....

Sylvia Plathypus said...

LMAO I think we were separated at birth...

I laughed so hard reading the candy fart line that I almost peed myself!! Seems interesting that she even has it together enough to come out with a line of anything but skeezy porn or designer cocaine. I too want to murder and remurder those twatty bitches with the baby voices. I hear them in public and remark to my husband that if they worked as hard at being smart as they did at making their voice sound like a total moron, they might actually make it in the world. And usually loud enough for them to hear me. LOL

Sylvia Plathypus said...

On an unrelated note, I ♥LOVE♥ the caption under Mr. Bojangles' pic!! What a cool kitty. =)

L said...

Passion of the mom, you are hilarious! Mr. Bojangles is pretty much the coolest and most judgemental cat ever. He even bitch slapped one of my gays.

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