Am I on Candid Camera?

Not honey, not sweetie, not tootsie, it's Dorothy, D-O-R-O-T-H-Y, Dorothy.

So...I was watching Tina Fey on Letterman tonight and she put up a photo of what she was for Halloween. Tootsie. Really, Tina?

It is a joke between some of my friends that I am the embodiment of Liz Lemon. It's not something I'm proud of because as Tina Fey said herself, "Liz Lemon is a more pathetic version of myself." Ouch. But the truth is supposed to hurt.

Liz Lemon=Moi

• Dated gay men
• Therefore has no gaydar
• Hates people that break rules
• Loves hot dogs
• Mistaken for a lesbian
• Can not be sexy
• Had horrible boyfriends
• Talks to food about her problems
• Star Wars Nerd
• Been a beard
• Loves Show tunes
• Has a foot secret
• Loves UNO
• People think she's racist
• Judges with facial expressions
• Tries to be nice
• Endanger of being an old spinster
• Would rather have men buy her food, than drinks
• Stays up all night writing
• Uncomfortable with sexual stuff (Yep, not a skank.)
• Loves ham
• Horrible dancers
• Has great relationship with TV

I could keep going for a while more, but you get the point.

But the Tootsie thing is the LIMIT! No one loves Tootsie more than me...NO ONE!! You need to stop with the hidden cameras (unless Stacey and Clinton are going to pop out, then that's OK) Tina, no more stealing my life. I need to capitalize on it first, damn it!